I can't believe I'm getting married in 3 short days! Our tent went up yesterday and all the details for decorations are still being worked on. There is still plenty to do, but it is coming together. Prayers are still greatly appreciated!
This whole roller coaster ride has been pretty crazy since last November when we got engaged. But if I have learned anything, it's to let go of stress, worries, and anxieties and trust that God will work out everything for the best. I can't tell you how many times I've had to learn this lesson, and I know I will keep relearning the same thing. Let's face it, I'm prone to wander! But God is good and always helps me find my way again. As for this moment though, I'm in such amazement of all the small and big miracles that have happened in these past several months and weeks that I'm excited for Saturday and keep reminding myself that it will be wonderful no matter what happens.
Rain, flowers dying, favors unfinished, hair being a mess, tripping down the aisle, and thousands of other possible mishaps are out there, but these are all small things. None of them can stop the actual wedding and marriage of two lives. Wedding days are so hyped up in movies and Tv shows that we forget what is actually happening on that day. The day is not meant to celebrate how big or pretty you can make an event be. It's not to celebrate flowers, or dresses, or hair, or food, or decorations, or anything other than to celebrate two lives being joined together forever. If you get hung up on the details, or on how "perfect" the day will be, you will be disappointed. No day is perfect! You can drive yourself insane trying to have control over every tiny detail, but you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Your idea of control is a joke and an illusion. No human has actual control, ever. Sure, you may plan to leave in a few minutes to go to the store and pick up milk, and sure, it may happen exactly as planned. But do you really think it was you who made that possible? A million things could have stopped you! You could've tripped leaving and had to go to the ER for stitches. Your car could have suddenly broke down for no apparent reason. You could get all the way to the store and they're out of milk! Or many other things could have prevented you from carrying out your plan. Don't let life fool you, you are never really in control. You can make decisions and try to carry them out. But the ultimate control does not fall to you. So, for planning a wedding, it's necessary to remember that you may plan and plan and plan, and even make back up plan for your plans, and you can even try to think of a solution for every single possible thing that has potential to go wrong. But even those plans can go wrong! The best bet is to make plans and decisions, and then let go of them. Trust that whatever possible thing you can think of going wrong, will in the end be fine.
My mom used to always stop me when I would start to stress out about a test or project and say, "Lindsay, if you fail this, what's the worst that could happen?"
"I could fail my class!!"
"Okay, and then what would you do?"
"Um, I guess retake it"
"And then what would happen?"
"I don't know. Maybe pass it, maybe not. Either way I'd have to be in school longer"
"And then what?"
"Well, I'd eventually graduate"
"So whether you pass or fail this test, either way you will still be fine"
"Um, yeah, I guess you're right."
This would always help me stop in my stressed out tracks and finally be at peace again for whatever I was so worried about. I can't tell you how many times for how many things I've had to go through this conversation again with my mom or just with myself. Nothing is worth stressing out about. Stress is bad for you for a reason! It causes high blood pressure, and free radicals which in turn can cause wrinkles and aging. You aren't meant to take on the weight of the world. And no matter how much you stress or worry about something, it can never change the ending outcome of that situation! So why even bother stressing about something when it only physically and mentally harms you and doesn't even change anything! It's so much better to just let go, and let God do His thing. And then, you can relax and think clearly. This wedding day is only one day. It is only a split second when you look at the time line of eternity. The day is only a moment, but the marriage is eternal. So what is the more important thing to look at? What's the more important thing to prepare for?
So Saturday, if rain should come, if I should trip, if my hair should completely fall apart, if my dress gets torn, if my flowers all die, if the programs all fly away in the wind to the water, if food is spilled, and whatever other what if's should happen, in the eternal perspective, none of it truly matters. All that really matters is that on Saturday, come rain or shine, I will be married to a wonderful man!
